Under Attack? God is about to do something BIG

You know that saying "anything that can go wrong...will go wrong?"Well it's especially true when you are trying to do something big for God. On Sunday I am getting baptised and ever since my girlfriend and I made this decision, things have been getting really crazy.

This week my car broke. Not surprising on anything...this car always used to always break down ( many of you may remember how the car radio would stay on even when the car was off and it would drain the battery and so the car would die all the time). But on the same day my computer also broke and my toilet overflowed. Now this may seem like awful luck or coincidence but I know better. You see the devil is angry! He is angry that I am trying to make the huge commitment to God to try and follow him with all my heart, no matter what that means. But I will not give in to these distractions. My friend told me not to be surprised if I get sick on baptism day or something happens. All of this was a little overwhelming, not to add my finances don't make any sense right now.

But then I started thinking about it and I know in the end God will win this battle. So why fret? Keep that in mind whenever your circumstances are overwhelming, know that if God wants something to be done it will be and there is nothing anyone can do to stop it. Smile! God is always by your side.

Also something I learned this week is that it's not always the fun road or even a road full of friends when following God completely. People look at you as if you're strange and can't seem to get why. But I promise the road is worth it! God has showed me time and time again, that when I give up everything and follow him, he will provide....not my wants but my needs. And what are your needs really? Really all you need to survive is God. I know that seems like the typical response but it's really true.

I have a reason for going on that tangent. I have decided to leave the radio show I am working on. Are you paying attention now? lol. The host of the radio show will constantly say things about other " Gods" and how they all are the same whether it be Buddha or what not. Well I just don't believe that at all. I really believe the only way to God is through Jesus Christ. ( My sister thinks I am crazy for this and actually started yelling at me about how all God's are the same....this was so shocking because I never really heard her talk about religion before...once again under attack). I cannot put my name on something with such mixed messages, as it can confuse an audience, so at the end of the month I am stepping down as the Associate Producer of the Show. I love working on the show and I love the host of the show but I know I am not being true to Jesus by trying to sell this show.

So now what?

Well right now there are a few things that appear to be options. One of my friends may move in with me for a little bit, which would help pay bills. I am still babysitting. I am always awaiting the check for the promotional modeling gig I did last weekend. I still might get offered the Station Manager Job in Detroit and then I could program my own station. I might get to work on a full length Christian feature film in Tampa ( I can't really say more then that right now). Or Maybe I will move to Jacksonville and live with my Grandma and work on her book with her and save up money. I don't know. But I do know one thing....God will be with me wherever I go and whatever happens next is going to be an exciting chapter in my life.

I feel like God is letting me do all the things I want to do, somethings maybe not in the extent that I would want to do them, but even if I got to be a grip on this big feature film, that would still be cool. This week ( thanks to a great friend) I got to sing in a choir. Now I haven't sang in a choir since the 9th grade . I was told too many times my voice wasn't good enough and gave up. I even had an ex boyfriend who used to turn up the radio when I sang, so he wouldn't have to hear my voice. I was so nervous when I went into sing, I was visibly shaking. But the people there were by far some of the nicest people I have ever met and even though I am not a fan of the music, I want to go back just to be around them. I hope I am like this. I pray that when people are around me, they will see the JOY of knowing Jesus and want to know what is different about me. Though there are hard times for everyone, rejoice my friends because God is with you and you can do all things through him. Don't let people tell you, you can't do something that God sent you to do. Imagine what people must of thought about Noah when he was trying to build the ark?

Stay true to your morals and believes and God and he will bless you time and time again.
I can't wait to see what will be happening in this next chapter of my life but I know it is going to be amazing! Stay Tuned for an after the baptism post. God Bless

You can do it...

When I looked at my agenda this morning. I was overwhelmed by all the things I had to do. But then I heard a song on Z88.3 ( yes I know it is a little odd that a hip hop/rap fan would listen the Z but I like it). The song is by Casting Crowns and goes like this.

"But the waves are calling out my name 
and they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times 
I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me 
time and time again
"Boy, you'll never win, 
you'll never win."

But the Voice of truth tells me a different story
the Voice of truth says "do not be afraid!"
and the Voice of truth says "this is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the Voice of truth"

So many times I feel like this. That I give my all and I still fall. But then my whole attitude changed. I went from feeling like there was no way I could do all these things.  To that I could do all these things and God was gonna help me.

After a great Radio Show with Recovery Music Artist Laura C ( she is the mother who drove drunk with her kids in the car and then wrote music to overcome her alcohol addiction) I rushed over to the junvenile court house for the religous runaway case. I was supposed to be there to report for Allen but I actually ended up getting interviewed by FoxNews (national!) and CBN (which would be a dream job to me)....I know I was on Fox because people saw me...I wish I could have seen it. I wonder which bite he used. If anyone knows people at Fox and can get there hand on that tape I would be so greatful. The woman from CBN, Wendy, was so nice and gave me her card. Maybe one day I will get to work with her.

Isn't it amazing how when you aren't trying to seek things they come to you? I also am now working with the Golden Rule Foundation. Henry Vales ( The Executive Director) was a guest on the show and was so thrilled with the press release I did for him, that he wants me to write press releases for his foundation. In exchange he will help find sponsors for the Saturday show  (God willing) I will be co-hosting in the next couple of months. The Saturday show will be like a 106.7 but with Christian music. Top songs in all genres of Christian music (mostly rap/hiphop/rock).However, we will also play music from local artists and have a competition every week and play the top artist. Our target audience is teenagers and college kids. We hope to get some churches on board for events etc.. We are still trying to come up with names.

I also had the training today for the promotional modeling gig I got. I will be at Amway Arena all weekend at the Dew Tour. Should be a fun time. I am the local market manager for the event and will be helping out with the promotions. I randomly filled out an application for that gig over a month ago and was amazed that I actually got it. I had never done any modeling before.

Tomorrow I am getting tested for diabetes. I am a little scared and wish someone was going with me. But then I think of all the other illnesses God has helped me overcome...Allergies, Asthma, Globohysterious etc..and I know I will be okay. Did you know that I used to take 8 pills a day? Then I gave them to God and said no " God you are my healer" and all that stuff went away? I know it sounds like I was into some crazy church. But I promise you God does make miracles happen. So many of us, forget about the miracles in the bible. We think that they don't happen now. But I assure you they do ( One day I am going to write a book about this) Sometimes they are small but God makes miracles happen in my life everyday. You just gotta trust and believe. Please don't go throwing your medication down the drain yet. Pray about it. God may be calling you to stay on it. Also take on the diseases or struggles in your life. My grandma by every account should be dead by now but she is a fighter and that's why she is alive. 

If you wanna live...you gotta fight for your life. And be thankful you have another day. Know God has got it all under control. When I get stressed and stuck in traffic lately or I can't figure out why I am struggling with something I take a deep breath and say " God I am exactly where you want me to be". Who knows God could have saved me from an accident. 

To sum up: There is a reason for everything. When you are stressed breath. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. This thought will change your life and bring new calmness to a seemingly hectic day. I love you guys and I know God has great things planned for you. You are here for a reason, so get to work : P

***The picture is of Linnda, Henry and I

Blurry Vision

Last night I was driving to my girlfriend's house and I couldn't see the road signs... I had to call her and ask her for a landmark so I could figure out how to get there. I've been there before and I knew the road I needed to turn on but I just couldn't see any signs.  This also happened the other night when I was driving to my other friends house. I am 90 percent sure I have diabetes.

I have all the symptoms...constant urination, excessive thirst, fatigue,acne and blurry vision. I think I've known this for a while now but I have been lying to myself.They say if you are told something 3 times by 3 different people something is mostly likely true. Well I have probably had 10 people tell me I may have diabetes.

I know I need to go to the doctor and will hopefully be going this week. If you read this and you know I haven't gone please kick me!